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cardcaptorkatara:

I dunno okay. It just came to me when I was watching Sharknado 2 the other night.

Missouri knocked on Ohio's door. "Hey, Ohio, haven't seen you in a while. Want to come out?"

alwayswatching-neversleeping:

jackieszanymultiverse:

alwayswatching-neversleeping:

There was a startled yelp from beyond the door, and a clattering of opening and closing drawers. Ohio’s voice came from the other side.

"No! Go away! I mean…I’m busy…I mean…don’t come it!"

Yeah, that’s totally not suspicions, Ohio.

image

"Of course not! We’re ship-girls, remember, and we didn’t have the ‘girl’ part until five years ago when all this Abyssal shit started up. We didn’t know anything about safe sex because no one in the USN thought to tell us about it! After all, no one expected us to be able to get pregnant in the first place, or hell, that Iowa would have a tenth cannon with magical impregnating abilities. It’s not really depleting the war effort here, as this entire fleet is just reserves anyway. The JSDF and USN do the real fighting, while all the WWII relics like me and Big Sis guard the shores and anything up to about 1000 km away. This is the dumping ground for obsolete ships, and you were sent here because you can help get rid of all of those pesky bosses that we just don’t have the firepower for. At least, that’s the best that I understand the situation. Not that it’s a bad one, mind you. I can still fight, and I get to be with my family, something I haven’t been able to do in years. Maybe soon we can get some hunter-killers sent to escort you down there, so you won’t have to be alone in the depths, either. Oh, and the amount of girls that sis has impregnated is six: every single Iowa-class, CVN-65, and apparently a demoness. Didn’t even know demons existed, but apparently Sis’s dick game is just that strong.”

Ohio’s mind was wound up so tightly by years of conditioning and isolation, that the news of such a huge breach of protocol was literally beyond her ability to immediately comprehend. Her mouth opened and shut several times, and she trembled a bit before finally finding her voice again.

image

"…Does the admiral know about this? The admiral must know about this. Five ship girls impregnated, it can’t have gone unnoticed. What…what did the Admiral do? How…how bad was Iowa’s punishment?”

On the one hand, Ohio hoped that the admiral had shown a degree of leniency; she considered Iowa a friend, after all. Or at least a respected comrade in arms. On the other hand, she knew that such a flagrant breach of protocol and lack of discipline merited severe consequences.

"Big Sis’s main punishment is that she’s no longer allowed to use her tenth cannon without a condom. She’s getting the damn thing under control, but none of us are used to having hormones to begin with, so the Admiral’s a bit lenient. In addition, she’s picking up the slack for J, Wisky and I. Technically speaking, Iowa didn’t breach protocol. There is no protocol for property of the USN disabling other property through impregnation, as we’re currently not recognized as enlistedmen or officers, though we do get salaries. Of course, the veterans’ lobbies are going to change that through their pressure in Congress, and then once we’re recognized as captains of ourselves, in a sense, we’ll be able to prevent incidents like what’s happened with onee-sa… big sis."

phlegminism:

"Are you a Sailor Scout?"

"I’m sailor Freddy Mercury."

venomxblast:

inceptionisntimpossible:

more-than-one:

image

Any curse, chain mail, whatever reblog or you’ll ____ post.

Has now been broken.
Enjoy your day/night as a free/safe human being~

bless your soul

you beautiful perfect being

broken-universes:

jackieszanymultiverse:

broken-universes:

"Sounds less interesting than I thought." She grunted. "… Do I even know you?"

"No, no you don’t. Name’s Lovelace!"

"A pleasure to meet you." She nodded. "Are you another one of those strange anomalies that’s appeared? Like those girls that helped us out some time ago?" 

"Anomaly? What do you mean by anomaly? I’m just an unusual Unison Device, is all!"

broken-universes:

jackieszanymultiverse:

broken-universes:

Ginga cupped her face and sighed. “Pleeeaaaasseeeeeeeee try to learn so you don’t embarrass yourself.”

image

"Sorry! I’m only used to DOS and Mac OS."

"It’s fine… Just… Please learn." Ginga cupped her face again.

Noriko nodded. “I’ll try. It’s all very strange… no real advances in space-tech since the Eighties, but so much advance in computing… they even have phones here that can be used anywhere in the world, without wires!”

Kakumei Mahou Shoujo Episode 4 - RUUUUNNNEEESSSSSS

broken-universes:

jackieszanymultiverse:

broken-universes:

"Ahh yes, such fond memories…" He looked all starry-eyed. "But nevertheless, the past is but a memory. We must focus on the now."

"Yes, the now… And the now is finding the script! Now give me a boost."

"Sure thing!" And A-Drei stepped down to give the L-Elf a boost up.

L-Elf used the boost to unscrew and remove the vent, then crawled in and held out his leg so that A-Drei could use it to get up.

Missouri knocked on Ohio's door. "Hey, Ohio, haven't seen you in a while. Want to come out?"

alwayswatching-neversleeping:

jackieszanymultiverse:

alwayswatching-neversleeping:

There was a startled yelp from beyond the door, and a clattering of opening and closing drawers. Ohio’s voice came from the other side.

"No! Go away! I mean…I’m busy…I mean…don’t come it!"

Yeah, that’s totally not suspicions, Ohio.


"Well, I still serve as a cruise missile platform, but… as to the who and how, it was with Iowa. We definitely weren’t expecting that, and I was the first that she knocked up, so we didn’t know yet that her tenth cannon is ‘first time, every time’." Missouri sighed. "So right now I’m just shore patrol, and even that is just to keep me from going stir-crazy. I’ll hopefully be taking a trip back to Pearl soon to pay my respects to Arizona, but… Ohio, have you thought about asking for psychiatric help? Just from human psychologists, not the typical USN people. We’re very… different from what we used to be. All we were up until a couple of years ago were big slabs of metal, after all… Anyway… I don’t know what kind of ship my kid with Sis will be, besides that she’ll likely be a battleship. Best odds are on a Montana-class, though I’m praying that she’ll be equipped with the new prototype railguns and nuclear-fueled."

image

"…Iowa? You…why didn’t you use a condom, though?? And…just how many other girls has she knocked up?! Why wasn’t she using protection?! This is…this is ridiculous! Does the admiral know about this?! We can’t afford this sort of irresponsibility in wartime! Not to mention if it’s SHIP GIRLS she’s impregnating, that means our front lines are being depleted of potential forces while they’re on maternity leave! This is…I..I’m sorry….I’m sorry…I should be happy for you, but…but…did the condom break or something?? Why wasn’t she using protection with…I…didn’t they teach basic health class during training?"

"Of course not! We’re ship-girls, remember, and we didn’t have the ‘girl’ part until five years ago when all this Abyssal shit started up. We didn’t know anything about safe sex because no one in the USN thought to tell us about it! After all, no one expected us to be able to get pregnant in the first place, or hell, that Iowa would have a tenth cannon with magical impregnating abilities. It’s not really depleting the war effort here, as this entire fleet is just reserves anyway. The JSDF and USN do the real fighting, while all the WWII relics like me and Big Sis guard the shores and anything up to about 1000 km away. This is the dumping ground for obsolete ships, and you were sent here because you can help get rid of all of those pesky bosses that we just don’t have the firepower for. At least, that’s the best that I understand the situation. Not that it’s a bad one, mind you. I can still fight, and I get to be with my family, something I haven’t been able to do in years. Maybe soon we can get some hunter-killers sent to escort you down there, so you won’t have to be alone in the depths, either. Oh, and the amount of girls that sis has impregnated is six: every single Iowa-class, CVN-65, and apparently a demoness. Didn’t even know demons existed, but apparently Sis’s dick game is just that strong.”

broken-universes:

jackieszanymultiverse:

broken-universes:

"Wave and/or particles of matter affecting other pieces of matter?"

image

"No, because it’s just a law of the universe, and the way things are."

"Sounds less interesting than I thought." She grunted. "… Do I even know you?"

"No, no you don’t. Name’s Lovelace!"